The Wayward Mailman
Jill slid behind a huge oak tree. She watched the
mailman advance toward 1793 Norwalk Avenue. So far the morning
had been unsuccessful, but she was sure she would catch him in
the act. After all, he had been doing this for three years now.
Jill had to find out, the suspense was killing her. Also, her
reputation as the neighborhood gossip had to be upheld.
The mailman dropped several letters into the dark
mailbox on the wall, then crossed the neatly-groomed yard to the
next house. A dog barked nearby. Jill looked around
suspiciously, then glance at the mailman.
"Damned," Jill mumbled. She had been sure that 1793
was the right house. A very sexy blonde divorcee lived there.
Jill turned and rested with her back against the tree. She found
herself looking into the eyes of a 12 year old boy on a bicycle.
He was looking from her to the mailman and back again.
"What are you doing?" the boy demanded.
"Why aren't you in school?" Jill growled in an evil
mood. He looked like a nosey kid. He would probably grow up to be
a drug peddler.
"I'm home sick," he said condescendingly.
"Then get your ass into bed. You don't go out and
play when you are home sick. NOW!" she screamed, hurrying him on
his way. Jill rolled around the trunk of the tree and looked for
the mailman. He was gone! So it must be 1795. He didn't have time
to go anywhere else. Unfortunately, she didn't know who lived at
1795. Jill lived on the adjoining street, Madison Avenue.
Jill hurried down the sidewalk. She approached
1795, hurried across the yard and stood in front of a heavy
hedge. She could hear voices coming through the open window, and
one of them was definitely male. It must be him. She wanted to
barge in through the front door and confront them, but she would
be arrested for trespassing if she did. Unfortunately, screwing
the neighborhood women was not against the law, even for a
mailman who consistently delivered the mail half an hour late.
She had set out to see who was stealing that half an hour. It was
her half hour and she wanted it back. Her mail was supposed to be
delivered at precisely 2:13 PM. Somebody owed her. Besides, her
friends had challenged her. She had to find out all she could to
She heard a girlish peal of laughter and growled in
outrage. Not only were they fucking, he was telling her jokes?
How dare they. It was time to put an end to this. She broke a
branch off the hedge before her, jabbed her arm with it and
waited for a welt to appear. When one did appear she dropped the
broken branch and approached the front door. She hesitated for
only a moment, before pressing the button. A sweet black-haired
girl in her early twenties opened the door. She gave Jill a
questioning smile, looking around behind her, before looking at
"I... I hurt myself on your hedge," Jill said,
displaying her marked arm.
"My hedge is on my lawn, fifteen feet from the
sidewalk," the woman said with a quizzical smile.
"Wha... oh," Jill said in sudden embarassment.
"Come in," the woman said, stepping back. Jill
practically lunged inside. She immediately saw the mailman
sitting at the dinning room table. He was eating a cookie. There
was a tall glass of milk in front of him. His bag of mail sat on
the floor behind him. If he had been 200 pounds heavier and
dressed in red, he might have been mistaken for Santa.
Jill looked into his smiling, wholesome face, and
piercing blue eyes. Her breath was taken away at that one glance.
She had never been so close to him before. He was slender and
My God, what am I doing here? Jill suddenly
wondered, feeling totally out of place.
"Hi," the mailman said. "Come for cookies?"
"She had an accident," the woman said with a warm
smile. She needs a bandaid.
"I know you," he shook a cookie at Jill while
chewing thoughtfully. "1929 Madison Avenue?"
"Yes," Jill said in surprise.
"Why that's just across the block," the black
haired woman said in surprise.
Jill nodded, confused, embarrassed, horrified.
"I... I wanted to meet you and couldn't think of a rational
excuse," Jill lied to the woman. "So I made up..." she trailed
off, wishing that God would strike her dead and save her from
further embarassment. How could she be so dumb? How could she
mistake an elicit affair, with a milk and cookie stop? She was so
"How sweet," the woman said, pressing a bandaid
over Jill's welt. "Ok, you sit and I'll get another glass. Today
is chocolate chips, Todd's favorites."
"That's me," the mailman raised his cookie.
Jill reluctantly picked up a cookie, bit into it,
and moaned in enjoyment. By the time that the milk arrived, she
was just finishing her second cookie.
"Another happy customer," Todd said, wiping his
face. "I got hooked on Janice's cookies when she left me a batch
for Christmas one year. I thanked her, she invited me in and I've
been stopping ever since."
"I think that was four years ago," Janice said.
"Three," Jill said automatically. She didn't look
up to see the surprised looks on their faces. She finished her
third cookie and downed her glass of milk. Todd was lifting the
of mail to his shoulder.
"Wonderful," she gasped as the milk cooled her
stomach. "Thank you very much," Jill said, getting to her feet.
"I have to get back to my... house," she said, running out of
excuses. She practically ran from the house. Todd and Janice
looked after her in surprise. Todd shook his head, thanked
Janice, and walked out. Janice looked at her crumb-covered table,
shook her head at her peculiar neighbors, and started collecting
"How could I be so fucking stupid?" Jill mumbled,
pacing from one side of her dining room to the other. "How could
I be SO fucking stupid?" she yelled. She looked out the window
and saw the mailman approaching. She was still so embarrassed
that she wanted to die. But she wanted to fuck that good looking
son-of-a-bitch even more. Out of sheer desperation she rushed
toward the front door and yanked it open, scaring him out of his
wits. He paused with the mail in his hand and handed to her with
"Please, come in," she said, pulling him
"Well I really have..."
"I wanted to apologize. I thought you were having
an affair and I was jealous. I went to confront you and..."
"Why would you be jealous?" he asked
"Because... because... Because I wanted to have an
affair with you too," she finally gasped.
"Really? That would be wonderful. Nobody has ever
offered before," he said happily. "I've heard stories, you always
hear stories, but to actually meet..."
"Will you fuck me or not?" she demanded.
"Well sure. I'd be happy too," he dropped his mail
bag on the floor. She gasped in surprise, then quickly slammed
the door behind him. She led him to the couch, abruptly at a
loss. She really hadn't expected him to say yes.
"You have a nice place here," Todd said, looking
around. "Does a husband come with it?"
"No, not any more. We were only married for a
"Too bad. It's a hell of a waste," he said,
suddenly touching her shoulders. She shuddered under his touch.
She bent and began patting couch cushions into place. He leaned
forward and placed his nose near her ass. He sank down to his
knees behind her. Her pussy was so close he could smell it. It
smelled delicious, a little like pussy and a little like lilacs.
He inhaled deeply, taking in her heavenly aroma. Slowly, with a
will of their own, his hands came up and touched the back of her
legs. Gently, they slid up into her shorts, until each hand held
a cheek of her ass. He kneaded them firmly, while pulling her
pussy up against his nose. He inhaled again. He heard her take a
deep, shuddering breath. She moved slightly, spreading her
THE MEMBERS SECTION